Chocolate Girls with Golden Hair Read online

  Michelle reached for the napkin from her lap, gently wiped her mouth, and sipped her water. "Edward and I are going up to Wisconsin this weekend, and I've been working so much overtime, I haven't had a chance to pack a thing."

  "I don't think I could steal Bruce away from his family for an entire weekend, but we make up for it," Camina said.

  It was as if Bianca was a piece of furniture as she sat there, observing, not saying a word. She was without anything to contribute to their conversation, having no big plans to speak of and no boyfriend to boast about or complain about. Had she made a mistake in coming out with the two of them? Bianca hesitated to say anything negative about Camina's relationship with her boss because it was sure to arouse uncomfortable emotions in Camina, but after thinking about it, Bianca refused to sit quietly any longer. "You better be careful with him," Bianca said. "I heard he has a heart condition."

  Camina didn't even look at Bianca. Instead she chuckled and glanced over at Michelle. "Who do you think gave it to him?" Camina asked with a giggle.

  Michelle and Camina both shared a laugh as if everyone got the joke, but Bianca.

  "Really?" Bianca asked.

  Michelle glanced at Bianca. "She's just kidding."

  "I gave him a lot of things, but I didn't give him that," Camina said.

  "Doesn't it bother you that he's married?" Bianca asked.

  Camina glanced over at Bianca, then Michelle.

  "It depends on how you waste the time," Camina said.

  Not only did Bianca not understand what Camina meant in her last statement to her, but Bianca also could not help but notice how Camina seemed to make a concentrated effort not to look at her for longer than a second. It was as if Camina wanted to make like Bianca didn't exist.

  Bianca sat erect in her seat, looking uncomfortable. She then finished off her iced tea and asked, "So it doesn't bother you that he's married?"

  For the first time that afternoon, Camina awarded Bianca a direct stare. "No."

  "Bianca's right," Michelle said. "There are a lot of single men out there. Why go through the trouble of dating one who's married? And very married I might add."

  "Who are you kidding?" Camina said with a sluggish smile. "Those are the best ones." Camina laughed and directed her attention to Michelle. "You know how some people say they never date married men. Well, I'm the exact opposite. That's all I date."

  Camina's words reminded Bianca of her late sister. How her sister would rebel against the norm, doing everything the opposite of everyone else and taking great pride in it.

  It was a welcomed sight for Bianca when the waitress brought over their check. Soon this lunch outing would be over, and Bianca could bury it in her past.

  "So, Bianca," Michelle asked as she picked up the check. "Any thoughts on those absurd statements Camina made about married men?"

  Camina's eyes shot to Bianca as if she dared her to say something, anything at all.

  Bianca felt the perspiration in her hands. "No."

  A faint smile raced across Camina's face as she turned away from Bianca.

  Michelle casually changed the subject and directed her attention to Bianca. "Anything planned this weekend?"

  Bianca was about to speak when she saw Camina studying her with her cold eyes. It seemed Camina was waiting for just the right moment to cut her down with the smallest error.

  "I don't have any plans," Bianca said.

  "You have to have something planned. There must be something that you're going to do," Michelle said.

  "I don't know, I'll probably watch my Netflix movies and clean my apartment."

  As Bianca finished uttering her mundane plans, perspiration crinkled down her forehead.

  "And that's your weekend?" Camina asked.

  Michelle jumped in fast. "There's nothing wrong with that. We all need to spend quiet time at home sometimes."

  "We all need to, but we don't, that is if we have any kind of life at all."

  Bianca eyeballed Camina, then quickly turned away. Bianca knew that Camina would have something insensitive to say, which is why she hesitated to answer in the first place. Camina seemed to know just how much sarcasm and condescension was required to make Bianca feel alienated and uncomfortable.

  Camina moved her drink to the center of the table, scooted closer to Bianca. "Bianca, let me ask you something."

  Bianca could tell by the tone of Camina's voice and her directness that she would not be prepared to answer.

  Chapter 3

  CAMINA PEERED INTO BIANCA'S EYES, seemingly holding her breath and asked, "Have you ever done anything exciting or bad in your life? Or were you always this boring?"

  Bianca's mouth hung open as her eyes moved to Michelle, hoping Michelle would answer for her.

  "Camina!" Michelle said, bewildered.

  Camina smiled with a matter-of-fact flavor. "What? I just asked a question."

  "Bianca, you don't have to answer that," Michelle said just before she picked up the check. "We're getting ready to go."

  Camina rested her hand underneath her chin, seemingly amused. Almost sickened by the sight of Camina, Bianca's eyes locked in with Camina for a long time, staring at Camina's painted on eyebrows. Her malicious question had sent Bianca to a place of discomfort that seemed inescapable. As Bianca opened her mouth to speak, she hoped something sharp would come from her lips, but nothing.

  How was she going to answer?

  Bianca so badly wanted to say something, anything to silence Camina, but she didn't know what. Finally, Bianca broke the embarrassing stare, turned away and didn't say a word. Her palms were sweaty as she stared at the cold pizza in front of her. Camina had won this round, because she had left Bianca without a word of retort.

  "That was so uncalled for," Michelle said in an elevated tone. "And very mean."

  A frail smile covered Camina's face. "Did I hurt your feelings, Bianca? I sure hope not."

  Camina's words were layered with condescension, and Bianca felt doused with ridicule, shame and fear. But she refused to stoop to Camina's antagonizing level.

  Camina plucked her Coach wallet from her purse and placed a $20 bill in the center of the table. "I guess we should go. There's nothing exciting going on here." Camina continued. "By now Bruce has probably paged me twice already. He knows that I take an hour for lunch, but every day he thinks I'm only going to be gone for thirty minutes."

  Bianca picked up the $20 bill and handed it to Camina. "I'll take care of it," Bianca said. "I'll put it on my credit card."

  "You don't have to do that," Michelle said.

  "No, it's okay," Bianca said.

  "If she wants to pay, let her," Camina said. "I just wish that I had ordered more of everything."

  Michelle's wide eyes peered over at Camina, then Bianca "Are you sure about this?" Michelle asked Bianca.

  "Yes," Bianca said. "I'll take care of it."

  Well aware of how odd her actions appeared to Camina and Michelle, Bianca knew what she was doing. She could not and would not let on just how much Camina really offended her and this was her way of demonstrating just that. While Camina and Michelle gathered their things to leave, Bianca placed her credit card on the center of' the table, on top of the check. "I'll meet you back at the office," Bianca said. "I'm going to make a quick stop at Starbucks."

  It was not unusual for Bianca to frequent Starbucks on her lunch hour, but that was not the case that afternoon. It was Bianca's choice not to walk back with them and definitely not to spend any more time in Camina's presence than necessary.

  Camina exited the table and waited for Michelle.

  "I'll see you back at the office," Michelle said to Bianca. "And thanks for lunch."

  Bianca waited for Camina and Michelle to move through the revolving doors, grateful that lunch was over. It should have come as no surprise that Camina would continue to spit her poison every chance she got. Baffled, Bianca could not understand why it was that Michelle never just invited Bianca out alone. Fo
r some reason, it always had to be the three of them.

  What was that all about?

  All the same, this was their last lunch together as a trio and Bianca meant it. If Michelle wanted to have lunch with her, then fine. But not Camina, not ever again.

  Camina was right.

  As much as Bianca hated to admit it, deep in her heart, Camina was right about her never having any fun. Bianca headed back from the restaurant, thinking about everything that transpired over lunch. She saw herself as a boring individual, and she did not like it. Despite her late sister telling her that she would always be wonderful just as she was, Bianca found her sister's words hard to swallow, especially after what happened over lunch. All the same, she never did anything fun, exciting or different. Her idea of fun was participating in her watercolor class, and that was about as risque as it got.

  Camina's blunt words were still inexcusable. Though Bianca wasn't the type to hold a grudge against anyone, she considered making a concentrated effort to hold a grudge against Camina, but in the end decided against it. She was a forgiving person. And she was not about to allow Camina to change her or mold her into someone that she wasn't. The scary thing was it was already happening. She was already holding a grudge against Camina, if only on a subconscious level. Though she always forgave, she also always remembered.

  The thought of becoming someone else, a different somebody returned to her fast. The idea excited her, even elevated her spirits. She didn't know exactly what to do or where to start, but one thing was for certain, change was needed, and it was needed now. Desperately, she needed to move forward with her life, move past her family's untimely death, and live. Eventually it would come to her and when it did, if only for one day, she would cut up and cut loose.

  Back at the office, Bianca stood at the bulletin board in the lunchroom, reading about the upcoming Christmas party when she heard the clatter of high heel shoes coming in her direction. When she turned around, she found Michelle standing behind her.

  "There you are," Michelle said. "I've been looking for you. Did you grab something delicious at Starbucks?"

  Bianca caught herself about to lie, but then changed her mind. "I didn't go to Starbucks." Bianca paused for thought. "Camina hates me, doesn't she?"

  "She doesn't hate you. She just has a problem with people that are different from her. It's an obsession among the very beautiful and the very popular."

  "No. She hates me."

  "Forget about her," Michelle insisted. Michelle grasped Bianca's hand and said, "I don't hate you. In fact, I like you."

  Bianca's eyes scrolled down to Michelle's hairy arm, and observed her hand joined with Michelle's. And for a few seconds, Bianca believed that Michelle liked her for other reasons. Realizing that she was probably reading more into Michelle's affectionate nature than necessary, she dismissed the thought from her mind. Michelle seemed to pick up on certain vibes and abruptly released Bianca's hand from hers. "Sorry."

  "No, it's okay," Bianca said. "What's up?"

  Enthusiasm glistened from Michelle's immense eyes as her voice escalated to a screech. "I have a friend who wants to meet you."

  "A guy?"

  "Of course a guy, who else?"

  "Why?"

  "I told him about you, and now he wants to meet you and before you say no, let me tell you about him. He's funny. Very funny. Smart. Very smart. Cute. Very cute. And he's a gynecologist or something with an 'ologist."

  Why did Michelle suddenly want to set her up? Did Michelle feel sorry for her?

  "Is this a charity offering because of what happened at lunch today?"

  "No, it has nothing to do with that. I know you can find your own dates."

  "I could if I wanted to.

  "I know you could. So, are you interested?"

  Bianca had not been very popular with men these days, as the only person, in some time, that showed any interest in her at all was Lee. Bianca knew that she would have to at least consider the offer though she didn't think she would be good company to anyone who didn't really know her. "I don't know," Bianca said.

  "Bianca? How long has it been since you've been out on a date? I mean a real date. I'm not talking about the time you spend with your friend, Lee."

  "A while."

  "And how long is that?"

  "A while." Bianca paused. "So he wants to meet me?" Bianca questioned. "Take me out?" Bianca just didn't get it. Why would anyone want to take her out?

  "Probably both," Michelle answered.

  Bianca didn't want to answer too quickly and later change her mind. "Can I let you know?"

  "Sure. You think about it."

  Moments later, Bruce Colby cordially entered the lunchroom, as if he just stepped from the front page of In Style magazine. Wearing his expensive silver suspenders, he looked like he owned the place, and his confident stride demanded attention.

  Bianca studied the handsome creature before her and couldn't understand how a man with so much going for him―senior partnership, good looks, power and a family, could fool around so openly with his secretary.

  "Hello, ladies," Bruce said as he headed towards the ice machine.

  Bianca returned his greeting while Michelle looked the other way. Bruce was one of the few attorneys who never valued himself above anyone else, regardless of his position in the firm.

  Bianca studied his masculine build and mysteriously Camina's obsession with Bruce rang a bell that resonated with her. Though Bianca had heard Camina boast about him many times, it never hit her until now. For the first time, Bianca realized the magnitude of Bruce's princely appearance. It was almost unreal.

  Bianca moved her mouth to Michelle's ear and whispered, "Is your friend as cute as Bruce?"

  Instead of Michelle answering the question, she made a quick dash for the door. "I'll talk to you later."

  "Michelle," Bianca said as she followed behind Michelle and quickly caught up to her. "Why do you always do that? Run away every time Bruce enters the room."

  "I don't always run away."

  "Is that your answer?"'

  "I just don't like him. That's all."

  "No kidding."

  "He uses people. Okay? And he gets what he wants more than he should."

  "What does that mean?" Bianca asked dumbfounded.

  "I just want to kill him sometimes."

  That remark definitely seemed exaggerated. "Why?"

  "Never mind."

  Before Bianca could utter another word, Michelle was gone. Bianca didn't know when or how, but she resolved to one day discover the source of this feud between Michelle and Bruce. Something definitely lurked between them. Bianca just didn't know what.

  Bianca caught a glimpse of her cousin, Stuart, as he came from the men's room. He had an air about him, a buzzed air that disturbed her, and she couldn't help but notice. That could mean only one thing: He was on that stuff again, stuff meaning cocaine, once again, despite his promise to stay clean while employed with the firm. Apparently it was true what people said about drug users. Once a drug user, always a drug user. But Bianca didn't want to be jaded. She liked to believe that people could rehabilitate themselves with the proper motivation. Obviously, Stuart was not properly motivated.

  "Stuart," she said, giving him a glance over. "How's it going?"

  "Couldn't be better," he said. Just as he was about to step away, Bianca stepped in front of him and very calmly asked, "You're not on that stuff again, are you?"

  Stuart didn't hesitate, didn't blink and didn't wince. "No."

  "Are you sure?"

  "Of course I'm sure. Don't be silly." He stuffed his hands into his pockets. As he disappeared from her side, all she could think about was how she willingly, and with the best intentions, inadvertently invited trouble into her work place.

  And she was already beginning to regret it.

  Bianca met with Dr. Kern for her Monday afternoon session, and waited for him to settle himself into his worn out recliner. She lay perfectly still on t
he sofa across from him. Though Dr. Kern never suggested that she lie back on his sofa, she was inclined to do so on her own. Since her last visit, she was feeling empowered and much more in control of her life. For the first time, she was making progress, which is what her visits to his office were about. New experiences excited her, if only she could experience some.

  Her decision to make changes in her life was just the beginning. As she lay on the sofa, Dr. Kern seemed relaxed, but not a word uttered from his mouth. It was as if he waited for her, giving her complete command of the session. She turned to face him, perused his large Adam's apple and tiny eyes. She expected him to begin by asking her some feeble question like 'how things were going,' but nothing.

  With all of his attention on her, she decided to go for it. "I think my friends look down on me, Dr. Kern."

  Silence as she waited for his response, but nothing, just more silence.

  "Did you hear what I just said?" she asked.

  Dr. Kern uncrossed his legs and asked, "When did you come to this conclusion?"

  "A few days ago."

  "Did something happen?"

  "Sort of," she said, then sat up. "I was just thinking about how different I am from my friends. They always have these exciting weekend plans, and all I do is paint, watch movies and cry. Mostly cry."

  "What about the drinking?"

  "Oh, I do that, too."

  Though Dr. Kern didn't say much, he was famous for his blunt and sometimes callous remarks. He seemed to study her, as if collecting his thoughts. "I take it this bothers you that you're not like your friends?"

  Bianca nodded. "It's been such a long time since I have even had a date, much less a sex life."